I don'[t know as to why, but I suddenly have the urge to write again. I think I shall blame NaNoWriMo as I did do a fair bit of writing last month and as such perhaps I still feel compelled to write. I only wrapped up yesterday, so perhaps that is the reason why. It reminds me of when I came back from Japan.
When I came back from Japan and was back in Sydney, it took a few weeks before I stopped feeling compelled to walk, not being quite comfortable with just sitting down. That might not have been a good feeling to lose. I’m still not quite comfortable sitting down for long stretches, but I feel less compelled to walk around.
I think that perhaps I need to find a way to recover that feeling, or sensation, or whatever it is, and reapply it. In the same vein I need to not lose the need and urge to write that I’ve somehow developed over the past month that has now somehow superseded my desire to write that was already there. It overwrote a desire with a stronger desire and for that I think I am thankful. Hopefully it doesn’t overwrite my desire to take breaks when they are required, but maybe it will and then I will cause myself even more pain than I already cause myself. We’ll just have to see as to how everything goes, assuming everything does indeed go. Maybe it won’t and maybe it will, but who knows at the end of the day? I don’t know, though maybe I do know and I’m just talking malarkey, though seeing as I’m getting stuck once more I need to move on and find something else to talk about.
It’s nice to have urges that seem to provide some sort of positive benefit, but of course you need to nurture them. You need to grow them and make them into things that are stronger, but also things that you can walk away from when you need a break of sorts.
This is not what this bit of writing is about and so I am going to move away from that and think of the summer and how it has begun on the day known as “today”, which happens to be a Tuesday.
I am not a fan of summer and I don’t mind making that apparent. I am looking forward to Autumn and what it brings, as well as winter when it finally returns. Feels like a while away, but it really isn’t. It’s not that far off. Only about six months away. That is not a long amount of time. It is an amount of time where a lot of things can get done and that is the hope, but as always it really is one of those things where you have to apply yourself to get to the end goal in the hope that you really make an impact on whatever it is that you are trying to make an impact upon. I don’t kn0ow if I will, but I do know that if I try I just might and I think that goes for everyone out there.
Now that I’ve said that I have to wonder as to why I entertained this urge to write when I have little of which I can express at the current moment. Maybe that’s just how things have to sit down and I have to embrace that, or something. I don’t necessarily mind that being a thing, or something, but now I’m left with a bunch of space and all I am doing at the present moment is writing about how I don’t know what to write and that’s not something that I want to get into at the present moment. I’ve covered it enough; there are other things out there that may be more worth the time going over. This is just a small thing at the end of the day, but seeing as it seems to want to emerge and come forth, I may as well let it do so and see what occurs, assuming anything occurs at all.
But then do I really want to? Do I really want to go down this path one more time? I think I’ve had enough of trying to entertain this thought process of which I have no interest in entertaining. Still, maybe it could lead to an interesting thought experiment, but of course I’d really have to work on it and make sure it is all sound and alive and vivid and all of those other things of which I would have to make sure in order to be able to make sure that the reading provides something not just to me, but to all of those who do indeed attempt to read whatever mess that I manage to produce.
Well, in looking over what I’ve written so far, I don’t know if this really amounts to anything. Perhaps there are some good points in what I’ve written today, but probably there are not. If there are, then I am sure, nay certain, that they could’ve been handled much better and much more effortlessly by people far better equipped to write anything, really. Still, I did what I needed to do at a particular juncture in time and that really is the thing that I need to embrace the most, or something. I don’t really know if that is indeed what I need to embrace, but I am going to pretend that that is indeed the case and then get on with the other things that I need to take care of as the day remains young, and so does the work load, though of course the work load has increased significantly, so I don’t know as to what it is that I am going on about, so I’ll just end this right here.
Wait; a bit short, so instead I will end this writing right here.
The time it took to write one thousand words: 10:07:48
I feel like this feels like moving up and down with waves.
Written at home.