A Longer Customer Rant

You know, I’m really done with all the crap that we (well, I) have to deal with customers.

Firstly, don’t tell me how to fucking spell basic words. In fact, don’t tell me how to spell something unless I ask. It’s annoying as fuck, especially when you keep getting my name wrong and can’t work it out, even though it’s just about as basic and stupid as your name. I shouldn’t have to repeat myself multiple times just because you don’t understand a basic name, then have you spell me something such as ‘Thomas’, or ‘Amanda’.

Those two names are extreme examples, but it does happen. More often than not, we know how to spell.

Secondly, stop assuming that you’re entitled to the answer that you want. You are entitled to the correct answer. Deal with it. Don’t try to make it my problem if you don’t bother reading things. Don’t get shitty. That’s your problem. You have no one to blame but yourself if you need something before the weekend and put in an order for something that will take more than a week to arrive.

Thirdly, don’t treat customer service reps like they’re beneath you. The world doesn’t revolve around you, you aren’t special and based on your shitty attitude, you’re not better than us. Don’t make our  job any harder than it needs to be. You want us to help? Don’t behave this way.

Fourth: don’t abuse customer service reps. We’re doing our job. You’re not going to get your way by abusing us.

Fifth: Don’t try to use “Well nobody’s perfect” as a defence when you blatantly ignore an option to make your delivery easier, then get shitty at a rep for not being perfect and making a mistake. Drop your smarmy cunt attitude and stop trying to get your way when you fucked up.

Sixth: Don’t talk over us when we’re trying to tell you something. Don’t assume our responses. Let us talk. Your issue could be resolved faster if you shut up and listened instead of acting in a way that implies that you think that you’re so important and right about everything. I don’t care if you’re frustrated. Shut up. Listen. Don’t interrupt. You didn’t know I was still talking? Then clean out your fucking ears.

On that note, don’t get shitty when a rep asks you to stop interrupting, interrupt them and tell them that they’re the ones interrupting. You show a clear disregard for the process of conversation, as well as a clear disrespect for the rep.

Seventh: When we ask for information or ask you to do something, don’t give us a whole story, or avoid giving us the information we’re asking for. Essentially, don’t fight us trying to help. More often than not, we have all the information on the issue up to when you last called. We don’t need a story, we don’t need you continuing to complain about something not working because you didn’t pay attention, or something broke. We need you to let us help you.

Eight: Don’t lie to us, even if you think you’re going to get away with it. It doesn’t help when you say you didn’t know something, then reveal you knew something but got away with it before, then get shitty when you can’t get away with it again. It’s pointless.

I’d probably be less angry this morning, but customers are getting really good at wasting not only our time, but the time of other customers. You chose an option that doesn’t work for you and then you complain that it does not work for you? Your problem.

Customer service reps should be treated better. It’s not the worst job in the world, but that doesn’t mean that we deserve to be talked down to, belittled, have people yell at us for no reason, be treated like idiots and deal with people who have a sense of entitlement that has to have come from some place of imagination.

You know deliveries? Not every courier service offers a specific time frame. Just because some do, does not mean that all do. This does not make service “ordinary”. Do you even know what ordinary means? You who can’t get a basic name correct and then decides to spell basic words?

Yes. I agree that not all customer service representatives are not good at their job, but that doesn’t give you the right to take out your crap on us.

If you’re one of those “valued customers” who thinks that it is okay to behave in any of the above manners, then take your massive sense of entitlement elsewhere. We shouldn’t have to deal with your bullshit.

If you persist, then shut up and let us do our job. We’re trying to assist you. It doesn’t need to be an uphill battle.

End rant

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About Stupidity Hole

I'm some guy that does stuff. Hoping to one day fill the internet with enough insane ramblings to impress a cannibal rat ship. I do more than I probably should. I have a page called MS Paint Masterpieces that you may be interested in checking out. I also co-run Culture Eater, an online zine for covering the arts among other things. We're on Patreon!
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