Five-Hundred Word Challenge 316: Cover your Mouth, don’t Sneeze on People

I’ve just been working on my bike so now I’m all fired up!

Roar and so on.

People in public… well, some people in public…


There are some people in public who need to learn some basic decency.

A friend of mine was on the bus and there was a person behind them.

The person behind them sneezed onto my friend because they were too busy holding their phone with both of their hands.

Now I know that it is difficult to cover your face when you sneeze, especially when you’re doing something as important as showing a complete disregard for not being an asshole by holding onto your phone when you sneeze. After all, holding a phone is an incredibly difficult task that only a few of us can master, but when you sneeze you do your best to stop it from going everywhere instead of ignoring a process that should be considered a basic obligation.

No one wants to get sick because some wonderful human being decided that whatever was on their screen was so important that they needed both of their hands to hold their phone.

People also do not want to get sick because other people decide that when they cough it is better to cough without covering their mouth with some sort of fabric, which is something that I have seen far too often.

I don’t care if you think that stopping the material that comes from your mouth is too difficult a task. Learn.

Basic hygiene is not a hard thing to learn.
It falls under basic etiquette.

You sneeze, don’t sneeze onto someone because you decide to be a selfish asshole by gripping your phone with both hands. Cover your nose if you can, or apologise.

You cough, don’t cough into the air because you’re too much of a selfish asshole to decide to cover your mouth because you think you’re above all of that. Cover your damn mouth.

I don’t think people forgetting is much of an excuse. If you forget something that basic, memorise the process until it becomes some sort of muscle memory.

I don’t understand why people think it is absolutely okay to forget to do these things.

I imagine that these are also the kinds of people that have the audacity to complain about people going in public and spreading illness.

Here’s an idea: maybe you’re contributing.

All I want to do is get to and from work on a work day without having to worry about getting sick because some idiot decided to be an extra special idiot in some particular moment in time that may end up having a detrimental impact to my ability to work.

I am sure that my friend feels the same way.

If you are so sick that you cannot stop yourself from sneezing or coughing, then perhaps you should either remain out of public until you get better, or take a cab to wherever it is that you are going.

The time it took to write five-hundred words: 10:05:91

Slower than other recent posts but also much more cohesive, kind of.

A bit too much repetition.

I was really stretching this one.

Written at home.

About Stupidity Hole

I'm some guy that does stuff. Hoping to one day fill the internet with enough insane ramblings to impress a cannibal rat ship. I do more than I probably should. I have a page called MS Paint Masterpieces that you may be interested in checking out. I also co-run Culture Eater, an online zine for covering the arts among other things. We're on Patreon!
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