I have a certain desire to succeed at almost everything I do, and yet it is often overwhelmed by a desire to do and see as many things as I can, usually changing far more often than I would hope, forcing my hand into directions usually unknown and known at the same time whilst I try to gain some sort of traction on my thoughts whilst they run away, escaping from my mind and then going on a sprint, leaving my body momentarily confused before I realise what has happened and go chasing after it, trying to keep up and close the distance between us, but the problem is the mind is a mischievous thing at times and this can cause no end of problems when trying to keep it in check and under control, for it likes to do its own thing and I am merely the vessel that translates its message through words, actions, and expressions, and it is the master to which I am so horribly (and yet, wonderfully) enslaved to it, being lead around and taken to different places whilst thinking of things far beyond my reach (and not of a reality), until it decides to do a runner and leaves me chasing it until it decides to stop and hop back in, for it is indeed its own thing when it wants to be.
That is part of the problem of which I am trying to express in some manner, although, with that being said, it is a most wonderful thing and I don’t think I would ever trade it for the world, for sometimes the mind needs time to wander and do what it wants to do, rather than have futile attempts to control it continuously thrown in its direction, causing more problems than solving, thus leading to situations that may be unpleasant, unexpected, or some unholy combination of both that could lead to more surprise than could ever be wanted, for trying to control the controller can only succeed in certain times.
Those times would only be when the mind decides to give some control for a short period of time until it decides that it’s done having a break and decides to take off into the directions unknown and mysterious, for that is sometimes what the mind wants to do, although sometimes it would much rather prefer to have a rest in a park and watch clouds go by for a long period of time, for even the mind wants to rest with a good view on the odd occasion.
Sometimes it doesn’t want to though and instead take you on lengthy walks that lead to nowhere in particular, until you realise that it is you leading the mind there for no real reason other than you’re confused and not wearing pants for some reason, but it’s probably a good thing that no one was around on the way there.
Of course, you hope that no one appears during the return trip.
The time it took to write five-hundred words: 8:02:16
I’m happy with the result. I certainly was not expecting this to turn out the way it did.
Parts of it are truthful and parts are not, as is the way of this bit of text.
Written at my (new) desk at home.