I thought I’d try to do another stream-of-consciousness post as a challenge but it’s left me thinking if I’m capable of doing such a thing or not.
Generally when I try this, I end up writing about my inability to write at times, or trying to think about something to write.
These are two things that can be difficult to make interesting enough to write about, especially when you’re trying to avoid writing about them.
A long time ago I heard the song “Tristia” by Hammock whilst I was in Red Eye Records.
It was in the evening.
This was around the start of 2011 (I believe).
I felt absolutely flawed when I heard it.
I ended up purchasing the album it was from (Chasing After Shadows… Living With the Ghosts).
When I’m looking to hear something I find relaxing, it’s usually one of my choices.
Compared to the rest of my collection, I do not own much relaxing music.
That’s not to say that most of my collection is intense, in your face blasts as my taste in music is usually quite varied.
However, in my adult life I’ve usually had a strong appreciation for more relaxing stuff so I’m a bit surprised as to how small a portion of my music is more laid back.
When I listen to it, it feels appropriate and special in a way that I can’t quite pinpoint.
Sometimes I’ll listen to it when I’m not feeling like relaxing as I may be feeling particularly attached to a band at a certain point in my life and it overtakes my desires to listen to anything else.
Sometimes I wonder if I’ll be forced to part with my music collection.
Even though I don’t expect to have everything I have forever, the thought still scares me. There’s a lot of tales and memories buried in what I own and in a way it feels as though I’d be giving part of myself up.
If there came a point where I was no longer able to listen to or make music, then I would find myself slipping into a deep sadness.
I’m aware of how overly dramatic that sounds, but I find it difficult to come up with an appropriate description for how I’d feel, so that’s as accurately as I can approximate it for the time being and I’m not going to rewrite this as that would ruin the point of trying to write this as quickly as possible.
It would then be less stream-of-consciousness which is not something I want to do.
Well, the final result would be.
This would still be but I feel this would be cheapened if I rewrote it.
Anyway, the reason why I mentioned Hammock is that I’m currently listening to them as I’m ill and tired and in bed and cold.
I had a camomile tea earlier and hearing the soothing sounds of this album has gelled well with it.
Hopefully my sleep is deep due to this.
The time it took to write five-hundred words: 21:03:94
I feel that is significantly slower than yesterday.
I think I thought too much about what I was writing instead of just writing.
Hopefully faster next time!